Is there such a thing as being happily single?

I came across this tweet the other day, a topic brought up by @COURgasm who found it hard to believe that people think that it is impossible to be happily single. She was also in awe that proclaiming such a thing made her a "liar" according to responses she received. One of her followers (@VyBeta) responded to her tweets by saying:

" It's difficult to believe someone can be content in and with self because the flesh requires too much instant gratification. Aloneness contradicts what it means to take care of flesh. It automatically suggests you're deficient in something. Not happy. "

So... With that being said...

Is there such thing as happily single?

Personally speaking, I can't even answer that question. Currently I'm single. I consider myself content because at this point I'm not trying to be in a relationship. In other words, I'm not out there pursuing. It's not that big of deal to me because I've played that part and I know what it really takes. I'm definitely not gonna act like relationships aren't good when they are good, but I'm not miserable without one. No need to wait to exhale, I'm breathing.

A lot of females express this same content with being single, but there are a lot of people who think anyone who says they are okay with being single is lying. I can understand why. There are plenty of females out here too happy to be single. They are out here cussing love out (when you know they're really scorned). Maybe it wasn't love, maybe it's you.

To equate that one couldn't possibly be happy being single because of the need to not only just be with, but touched by someone, is both ridiculous and yet somehow understandable. It coincides with my ideal that some people aren't anymore happy in a relationship then they would be out of it. They just have a void to fill. Not to discredit those who are happily in relationships.

This is a new generation of women who can feel okay about being single, but don't. The word "alone" sends shivers through the bodies of some who never look at this process as temporary, a time for self discovery and personal accomplishments. Instead, some women panic at the thought of lonely cold nights and start to think that being single may possibly be a permanent situation.

That eminent desire to belong to someone or be apart of something (a relationship) is rooted in everyone. But the second that someone proclaims happiness with being single, they are perceived as liars. Lying not only to others, but themselves as well.

Loneliness and desperation are the Achilles heel of all women, at least that is what we are made to believe. So appearing confidently single is often considered a exterior masking the sadness that weeps out at night on tear stained pillows. Yup. Except, no. That fact that it is easy to group all women in such a fragile state as neediness is disturbing. Yes, being comfortable with being single isn't easy. Especially if you are one to constantly be in and out of relationships, but it isn't a far- fetched idea either.

Singlehood isn't about realizing you can be happy, it's mostly about conforming to your status enabling you to try to consider being happy by yourself first. Being single does not automatically make you lonely. You are still able to date and test the waters all the while trying to discover what you want and what's best for you. But walk that line very carefully.

Do I believe all single people secretly want to be in a relationship? Yes. But I don't believe that you can't be happy without one.